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You Can Find Authenticity After Abuse

Updated: Oct 23, 2021

I had experienced extreme abuse before I was adolescent. I knew in the fourth grade that my life was turning for the worst.

My fourth grade teacher made a very lasting impression on me when she required me to hold my pen correctly, with my the top of my handwriting paper facing the proper direction, despite the fact that I was left-handed.

I remember the distraction of being chosen to attend a local magnet school during the last two years of elementary school in the midst of that trouble. Those are some amongst the few of the best memories I have from that period in my life.

Before seventh grade, I became a product of a broken home. By then I felt lost, confused, unsure how to be, I no longer trusted myself to think and make decisions for myself – I had lost myself in the violation.

I had concluded that my life was a door mat for everyone else to step on. I believed that I was unloved and anyone who expressed “love” really just wanted something from me. I graduated from high school afraid, not really sure of how to be an adult because my life was missing normalcy and the preparation I so desperately needed to thrive.

I was in my late twenties when I realized I needed counseling. Once I started the therapy, it took me three plus years to understand and accept the gross dysfunction, how it was still impacting my life (especially in parenting) and I gained some viable tools to resolve the traumas in order move forward into the life I desired – and giving my children the mother they deserved.

Reclaiming my authenticity has been a journey, but I know myself again. I like the me I am today!

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